Over the last few months, I have had an increasing number of conversations with clients, friends, and family around feeling a lack of clarity. Specifically, most have mentioned they feel unclear regarding where they are headed and what they want to do with their life. One client put it, “I feel adrift on the sea, without a map or even a rudder!” (A rudder is part of the steering mechanism of a boat.)

This is not an uncommon feeling at many different life-stages, but the prevalence of this feeling over the past 6 to 12 months across diverse and different groups is less common.

When we are feeling uncertain we’re on the right path, it is easy to get stuck in a routine of just going through the motions, day after day. We get busy and feel like we are moving to an endless cycle of same old, same old.

This is particularly true when the world is undergoing massive change; whilst change is occurring all around us, for many, our day-to-day is similar to groundhog day. With the only variation being what shall we cook for dinner tonight, and shall we wear the black T-shirt or the navy one. *shrug*

It’s at these times when having a breakthrough question or two can make all the difference.

Where do you see yourself in X years’ time?

I’m sure you’ve found yourself being asked a similar question in a standard career planning meeting, whether it be with a supervisor, prospective manager, or as part of a job interview. The oft-used, “Where do you see yourself in 3 (or 5) years’ time?” is a classic question as it helps the interviewer get a feel for where you want to go, and determine if your personal career aspirations align with the role, division and or organizations’ goals. I know in my career I’ve asked, and been asked, this question many times!

Before you sigh and give up reading this post, stay with me. We can take this standard question and tweak it a little. Instead of keeping our timeframe to 3 or 5 years, stretch it out to 20 years. Asking yourself, “Where do I see myself in 20 years’ time?” is a far more impactful question. When attempting to answer it, we are required to visualize a long way into the future, meaning we most likely find ourselves less attached to the small details and more interested in the big picture.

It might also be helpful to know research has found people who are connected to their future selves make more considered decisions that help them live healthier, happier, and more intentional lives than those who feel less connected to their future selves.

Another way to tap into this big picture and gain some clarity in the present is to ask yourself some questions to guide your thinking. For example;

If I fast forward 20 years, what does my future self wish I knew now?
What would me of the future wish I had started now or soon, and what advice would they give me about what I need no longer worry about?

What is important to my future self

Take a moment, close your eyes & visualize your future self

To get a different, more specific perspective about your future self, you may want to close your eyes and try visualizing your future self.

For ease, many of my clients do this by imagining they are meeting their future self as a separate person, and so think about their future self as ‘they’ rather than ‘I’. This approach assists with cutting through any noise or expectations of the current circumstances, including bypassing the “I should” feelings, and helps you focus on the “I deeply desire” feelings.

As you visualize this wiser, and more experienced, version of yourself, consider these questions as they relate to your life, relationships, business, and career;

What do I (they) feel is important?
What do I (they) see?
What do I (they) feel?
Where am I (are they)?
Who am I (are they) with?
What do I (they) value?

writing your thoughts and Answers gives greater clarity

After or during the visualization, when answering these questions, I encourage my clients to record their insights using a format suitable for later reference, such as a notebook or voice memo.

As well as providing you with notes to review later, writing answers down can be very helpful, as can talking to someone. Just reviewing your answers and feelings can help you get greater clarity. Discussing your answers to these questions with a trusted friend, confidante, or professional coach (that’s me!) can be even more beneficial as sharing the answers and your feelings with another person provide you with the added insights from that person’s expertise and experienced interpretation.

However, if you cannot discuss your answers with someone else, writing it down is a great option, and can you help you feel less alone with your thoughts.

“Thoughts disentangle themselves when they pass through the lips and fingertips.”
- Dawson Trotman

The vision of your future self

Additional journaling can increase clarity

After completing the visualization, you likely have a clearer idea of what your future self may value and consider important. But, I’d like to encourage you to take a little more time with your future self to really gain a clear vision.

You might like to try journaling about your future self, particularly exploring the areas where you are most keen to gain clarity. In your journaling, explore everything and anything as it pertains to your future self; Where do they live? Do they live with others or alone? How do they love to spend their day? What are they passionate about? What do they do on a day-to-day basis? How do they look after themselves? What is their favourite thing to do?

This extra journaling will aid in the creation of a more detailed vision of your future self.

A vision of your future self = clarity now

Having a vision of your future self can help the next time you find yourself feeling like you’re living your own version of a time-loop (groundhog day style), stuck or a little directionless, lacking in motivation, or faced with a difficult choice. By tapping into the vision of your future self, you may gain enough clarity to move through these challenging situations.

So, when facing a difficult decision, you can ask yourself, “What would my future self do or decide?”

Consider which choice or action brings you a step closer to that vision. Then use the resulting insights to make the decision or adjust your path, and reconnect with what’s important to you.

For example, I’ve found thinking about the vision I have for my future self has been incredibly helpful to assist with emotional decluttering decisions and keep me focused on saying yes to people and activities aligned with an intentional life. Plus, those times I want to sleep in and take a break from my early morning routine, having a vision of my future self (who is calm, present, and grounded because of her daily morning routine!) helps motivate me to meditate, even if I stay in bed to do it!

Indeed, your future self vision might be the key to your next goal, project, or life chapter.

After all, those who live the most rewarding lives, without regrets, are not those with a detailed plan. Rather, they are the people who are willing to step out of their comfort zone and try new things, despite being uncertain of the outcome. Most of us overestimate the risks associated with any change and fail to consider the cost of not taking action (choosing to do nothing is still a choice). As I’ve written about before, a small change in direction today can result in a very different outcome.

Greater clarity in the present

What changes might you need to make now to move towards the vision of your future self?

Fascinatingly, frequently the future self we visualize reveals a more authentic, aligned version of ourselves. Not only are we older and wiser, but we are also often more completely living our values, more fulfilled, and being our authentic selves.

Therefore, after visualizing yourself of 20 years into the future and describing the career, business, relationships, and life you enjoy, next you can use this to gain clarity in the present.

Specifically, you may like to ask your current self, based on what you want for your future self, the following questions;

Do I need to change direction?
If so, where do I need to make changes or adjustments in my current life/ career/ business to ensure I am heading in the right direction?
What new goals or projects would I like to take on?
What changes might I like or need to make?
Where would I take a chance?
What choices do I need to review?

Looking through the lens of your future self, we can gain greater clarity regarding the life we want to live, which includes our relationships, career, and business decisions.

So, next time you find yourself facing a challenging decision, feeling stuck, or needing some extra clarity, I’d encourage you to tap into the vision of your future self. Listen to the voice of your future self, and in alignment with that, start with a small step in the direction that will help make that future a reality.

(Not sure if the ‘future self’ idea works for you? You might prefer to consider living your ending now for a similar, but slightly different approach)

Embrace your future – take action now

Considering your future self is a powerful mechanism to move into aligned action and connect with your purpose. Working with a coach can provide even greater benefits.

As a certified career, business, and life confidence coach, I support people to make the changes they desire, so they can feel more aligned, purposeful, and confident in their career, business, and life. Coaching is a two-way relationship, so to get to know each other before we decide if coaching is right for you, I provide a comprehensive pre-coaching questionnaire and complimentary consult where together we can explore the changes you desire, answer your questions and determine if I am the right coach for you.

To get started, simply book your complimentary consult.

Book your complimentary consult