A key step for clarity; determine what enough means for you
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Most of my clients are seeking clarity and confidence in their life, career, or business. As part of this journey together, we start with clarity. After all, it’s hard to decide where we want to go and feel confident about it if we don’t have a clear vision or goal.
A key part of gaining clarity in our career or business and life starts with determining what is enough. What is it that is correct, or enough for us, in our career or business, and in our life right now?
Once you’ve identified what is enough and got clarity regarding what that looks like in all areas, it supports you to move with greater focus and intention, simplifying your life, and ultimately, feeling more assured and self-confident.
Have I got your interest? Let’s dive in.
What is enough?
Enough; as much or as many as required, as much or as many as somebody needs or wants. (Oxford Dictionary)
Determining what is enough is an ongoing process, and something we need to return on a regular basis. What is enough during one stage or phase of our life will change as we move into another stage.
Travelling Light helped clarify what enough was for my family
Personally, my most memorable experience of identifying what was ‘enough’ was when we travelled with carry-on luggage only for 3 weeks through the USA over Christmas back in 2014. We thought attempting to travel with carry-on only luggage with the kids would be a fun challenge, and something worth trying. There was no expectation beyond that! As I reassessed clothing and shoes, I was happily surprised that my baseline for ‘enough’ kept decreasing as I realised how little I actually needed. The limitations around the size and weight of my luggage helped me gain the clarity I needed to determine what my ‘enough’ looked like for that period.
The insights gained from that single trip have since shaped how we travel as a family, and how we choose to live our life. Embracing limitations and an experimental approach opened our minds to a new way of travelling. Additionally, by assessing what was enough in one small way for a short period (our clothing and luggage for a holiday), our mindsets shifted. It didn’t result in an immediate change to how we lived when we returned. But it did start the process of asking ourselves, ‘what does enough look like here?’ each time we faced a bigger decision, whether it be in our career, home or life. Being clear about what was enough also influenced my decision to retrain as a coach and gain my certification.
My top tip for determining what enough means for you? Just have a go in one small area of your life, as we did with packing light. Have a go feeling into what enough is for you, right now. You don’t have to have everything worked out and a solid plan. Make it an experiment and try it in a way that feels manageable for you. It doesn’t need to be any more complicated than that.
By experimenting, and working through the process we gain wisdom and knowledge. And yes, clarity and confidence too.
Determine what enough means for you
Considering what enough looks like for you can be uncomfortable, and we can be unsure how to get started. What worked for me, may not work for you, and vice versa. That’s okay! Determining what enough means for you is completely personal.
That said, to help you determine if it’s the right time for you to consider what enough looks like, here are some questions to consider.
How am I feeling about my career, business or life right now?
What does my idea of success look and feel like?
Rather than always seeking more in my job, home or lifestyle, what would genuinely bring me joy and happiness?
Based on this, does my next career move lend itself towards a sideways move, rather than a career step up?
Instead of growing my business until it dominates my every waking moment, what would be the perfect harmonious balance for me?
Rather than ending up with an unworkable schedule and overcommitted diary, what does enough look like for focusing on my career aspirations, keeping an active social life, and maintaining my well-being?
(Note these are not completely open questions, as they are based on the challenges many of my clients face)
“According to evolutionary psychology, our tendency to strive for more is perfectly understandable. Throughout most of human history, starvation loomed closer than it does, for the most part, today. A “rich” caveman had a few extra animal skins and arrowheads, and maybe a few piles of seeds and dried fish to spare. With this plenty, he might survive a bad winter.”
- Arthur C Brooks, The Atlantic
The questions shared above are difficult questions and are designed to get you thinking.
It’s important to note that what feels like enough in your 20s will be different by the time you’re approaching 40. What feels like enough (in all areas of your career and life) shifts when you have small children, and changes again as they get older, and their interests and needs adjust. What feels like enough when you are in times of transition is different again from when you are not experiencing significant life changes. And that’s okay too.
Our ‘enough’ evolves, just as we do.
If having pondered these questions you feel ready to consider your ‘enough for right now’, here are the next steps to help you establish what enough looks like for you. These three steps can provide clarity regarding who you are and your ‘enough’ for whatever phase of life you are experiencing.
1. Know your values
This is really as simple as identifying what matters to you. There are a number of ways of doing this. Here are three quick ways.
Look at how you spend your time versus how you would like to spend your time.
Another popular way can be to review your bank or credit card statement, as what we spend money on can be an indicator of what we value.
A third way is to consider what you love or what brings you joy.
For example, by using one or all three of these quick approaches, you might identify that you value security, family, freedom, education, travel, community, the environment, or something else altogether.
Remember, there is no right or wrong answer for what you value. What you value is a personal choice and is all about YOUR choices and priorities. (Still not sure? This values list might help)
“You won’t have enough until you know what enough is.”
—Joshua Fields Millburn
2. Get clear on your vision
Get Clear on your Vision
This means to get clear on the vision you have for your life, career, home or even your schedule.
When you connect with your ideal vision for yourself and can visualise what that looks and feels like, all other decisions are made easier. Creating a vision or having a specific feeling you want to achieve can be applied to all areas of your life. A clear vision can encompass relationships, social life, physical and mental well-being, travel, your career or business, family, volunteer work, personal development, creative pursuits, hobbies and so much more!
Your vision can be for anything from 30 years’ time, right through to tomorrow. It doesn’t matter as long as you feel inspired by it, and it helps guide you to where you want to go.
3. Identify the gaps
When you have named what’s important to you and articulated your clear vision, it is easier to see the obstacles in your path. That is, all the things that you are currently busy pursuing or preoccupied with but don’t directly or even indirectly contribute to the vision you have for yourself and your future.
For example, you may find that in your efforts to climb the ladder, you are exhausted and without energy on the weekend. As the weekend concludes, you are hit by a severe case of the Sunday blues.
Every week.
The weekend doesn’t feel sufficient to recharge your batteries. As a result, the time you get to spend pursuing your creative passions and/or with your family is not quality time. You are preoccupied and grumpy with those you love the most.
Alternatively, when you visualise your dream role or career, you are engaged in a role that brings you utter joy at work. You are recognised, appreciated and all your strengths are used. You look forward to going to work every day. And when it’s the weekend, you are relaxed and happy with those you love and full of ideas and inspiration for your creative pursuits.
In this example, if one of the core values you have family, love, creativity or freedom, climbing the corporate ladder may not be in fact aligned with the vision you have of yourself and the life you want to lead.
“Wealth is like sea-water; the more we drink, the thirstier we become; and the same is true of fame.”
- Arthur Schopenhauer
Use paper & pen for this gap identification exercise
Identify YOUR Gaps - A quick exercise
To support you further, you may like to identify the gap between your current reality and your preferred state. An easy way to get started quickly is by creating a list.
Grab a pen and piece of paper to get started. On the left-hand side write down all the types of work or situations you do not like, or do not want to find yourself in again. On the right-hand side of the page, write the opposite – the work that you love to do, or the direct opposite of all those things you do not enjoy.
As a quick example, if you do not like being expected to be on call at all hours, the direct opposite is predictability in work hours and requirements.
Continue listing items until you run out of points to add.
This simple process can quickly help illuminate where you need to make changes.
Being able to name what truly is important and articulate the vision of what you desire, whether that be in your life, business, career or elsewhere, is key to determining what is enough for you.
The prompting questions shared above plus the three-step process can be used as a starting place to help you reflect upon whether the choices you are making truly align with your values, the life you want to live and what matters to you.
Remember, identifying and determining what is ‘enough’ in your life, career and or business right now, is an incredibly personal process. What feels like enough for you, maybe very different from what feels right for your best friend, neighbour or me. And that’s completely okay!
The key to clarity is knowing what is enough right now. And moving towards that. Movement and action then boost your confidence, which ultimately supports you to live a more intentional, calm and contented life.
What now?
Perhaps you’ve followed the above steps, and have identified the gaps. Cue more discomfort.
It’s at this point that many of my clients come to me. They find themselves in a role or a stage of their career, which to the external world looks terrific, yet they feel unfulfilled. That is, they have moved away from their values and find themselves living disconnected from the life they would prefer to live.
Together we work to identify gaps between their current reality and preferred state.
As a certified career, business, and life confidence coach, I support people to make the changes they desire, so they can feel more aligned, purposeful, and confident in their career, business, and life. I do this via tailored one-on-one coaching.
All coaching is a two-way relationship, especially so when we are working one-on-one. Therefore, it’s important we get to know each other before you decide if coaching is right for you. You can do this by joining my mailing list to receive my regular newsletters.
If you know coaching with me is your next right step, get started by booking your complimentary consult.
